Did Trump take The Lord Humongous Offer?

Just. Walk. Away.

Welcome to Bruno Report, your one-stop shop on All the Internets for Krazee Tawk and Goofee Thee-rees!

OK, let’s start here for All That Follows to make sense: we are probably all pretty much in agreement that if Trump loses in November he and most of his family will be under a blizzard of investigations and indictments come February 2021.

The Blood Lust for completely destroying him personally, bankrupting him and ultimately putting him in political prison is and has been there since The Morning After the Election in 2016.

He is in a Game of Thrones situation: you win or you die.

Desperate times, right?

So why is Trump not behaving or governing like such a mortal threat to both his presidency and his personal life requires?

Here’s why: The Forces Aligned Against have made him the Lord Humongous Offer and he has taken it.

Just. Walk. Away.

(if you don’t understand then watch The Road Warrior and you’ll get it.)

The Forces have effectively insured that they will Control All once Demented Joe and a suitable lackey  VP have been selected and elected.

The Riots will stop.

The Chinese Virus will abate.

Normal commerce will resume.

The Media will go from sixty to zero in reporting crisis 24/7/365.

The Forces will again be in their accustomed positions of authority and power.

The Unelected Aristocracy of The Establishment will again have it’s hands on the rudder of The Ship of State.

The History of the Country and more importantly, it’s culture, will be Fundamentally Transformed.

The Social Order will be reshuffled and an Oppression Group Credit Score System put in place.

The Illegals will be legal.

And The Democrats will be in power in perpetuity, the majority of The Now Permanent Minority Republicans will happily return to The Grift and The Republic as we have known it will shuffle slowly off into a gentle sunset.

The Forces have made Trump a Deal he can’t refuse: go along to get along and you and yours get to live out your lives in a state of internal semi-exile thanks to Sundowner Joe’s Pardon which was issued for The Good of the Country.

Put up Resistance if you like, but if (when) you lose by going that route The Deal is off the table and it’s scorched earth against you and yours.

Talk about your Unified Field Conspiracy Theory of Krazee, huh?

You clicked and Uncle Bruno delivered!

Hit the tip jar so he get’s extra Cold Bat Gruel tonight, OK?


Now Just. Walk. Away…

Bruno Strozek

Written by Bruno Strozek

Bruno Strozek is the author of occasionally semi-coherent piffle and has been a Writer/Editor at Sparta Report since July 2016.

Strozek, along with his alter-egos the decadent, drug-addled Sixties refugee Uncle Bruno and his intolerably feminist SJW Cousin Brunoetta have been riding the not-yet crested wave of deplorability with posts covering politics, sports, entertainment and zombies.

Aptly described as both "hilarious and deeply disturbed" Strozek has enthusiastically embraced the recommendation of the late Raoul Duke that "when the going gets weird the weird turn pro."

Although he has fallen far short of his bucket-list goal of writing for such respectable rags as The National Enquirer and The Weekly World News Strozek is grateful for the opportunity to pen his unhinged screeds at Sparta Report and is constantly amazed and delighted at the reception his pieces receive in the cements.


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