On the 8th Day of Christmas Grievances, the stores gave to me………8 Blow Up Yard Decorations.
One of the great things about Christmas are the lawn decorations, especially all the lights put up around homes. I remember growing in Oklahoma and each Christmas, Dad would get everyone in the car at night and we would drive around looking at all the lights.
Sometimes, we would get a special treat. People would have put up Jesus and the Manger scenes. This would solicit the typical “ohs and ahs.”
Even today, every Christmas there are reports from television news about homes throughout the area really decorated with light shows, some timed to music even, flashing off and on. Hundreds of thousands to a million lights would be used to get the best effect and win contests that would be going on for the “best” house.
Sometime in the last 20 years, lawn decorations changed and not for the better. That is when those gaudi Christmas inflatables began to show up on lawns at Christmas time.
From 4 to up to 20 feet tall, you will find Santa, Elves, Frosty the Snowman, Reindeer and even Elmo and Snoopy. All filled with hot air. (Hmmm, a lot like politicians.)
What is noticeable about the Hot Air decorations is that when you see a home with them, almost always there is an absence of most other decorations other than some strategically placed lights. It is as if the homeowner has chosen to go with the Hot Air balloons because he is too lazy to actually put up real decorations.
If you have not guessed by now, I despise these things. During the night, all they do is create annoying noise while lighting up the home and yard in an undisciplined manner. And during the day, they just lay on the ground like a pile of leaves, waiting the blowing up process that evening.
It is even worse when I see the damned things on roof tops. If a person has the motivation to climb up a ladder and put a balloon on the rooftop, could he at least do something a whole lot classier?
While I am at it, throw the stupid light show projectors into this category. Just plain stupid.
Congratulations to Christmas Blow Up Yard Decorations. You are Day 8 of the 12 Days of Christmas Grievances. May you develop holes and have to be thrown away.
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