I was werking the derg (a little meme speak) and realized I’m a prime candidate for the bomber suspect.
I’ve said nasty things about Democrats in the past. Not as nasty as some of you have said, but probably nasty enough. If not, I probably hate Democrats “in my heart” even though I haven’t actually said so.
I’ve been to Florida which is where the NY Post says the bomber likely lives. Of course, probably fake news but when has that ever stopped a good federal probe?
We used to go to Florida every summer in my parent’s Oldsmobile Vista Cruiser station wagon. That was quite a drive particularly since I-25 only existed in pieces at that point. I’ve also been in Florida within the last year visiting my wife’s ultra-liberal friends. “I will not talk about politics — I will not talk about politics! Errrrrrggggh!”
I’ve seen the “Git er Done” ISIS parody flag before although I think it was Radius who actually pointed it out. Nevertheless, I have seen it and know what it is.
I live near the Unabomber, Ted Kaczynski.
Ted lives about 128 miles from me so about two hours depending on Denver traffic. He’s prisoner #04475–046 at the supermax prison in Florence, CO. I bet ole Ted is just slapping his head at this whole thing; no professionalism any more.
I have absolutely no experience at making a bomb and have no idea how to do it. This is the most important piece of evidence since the actual bomb maker obviously doesn’t know either.
I’ll be announcing a GoFundMe campaign very soon to cover all my legal expenses should I become a suspect. Since this post will get about 200 views, I’m figuring $1,000 per reader. That would give me about $200,000 which means I can retire a year or so earlier.
Now before you get all huffy, if the libs can give Christine Blasey Ford $632,421 so far, I think asking for 1/3 of that from a few right wing nut cases is only fair!
I guess I need to consider where I should retire. I know Ted had a cabin in Montana so that could be a possibility.
Unfortunately, the cabin is in a museum in Washington D.C. and is actually FBI property so that’s not going to work. Maybe I’ll just join the immigrant caravan, change my name to Marcos Rivera, a struggling Guatemalan painter, cross the border illegally, and live happily ever after.