1.And there was a great wailing hear throughout the land, and the mists of darkness continued to drift forth throughout, for the soothsayers runneth amok in the media, and some of the people believeth the lies and panic.
2. For the IG report whimpereth away and people crieth doom. Yet it stirreth the minds of the corruption of the law, and those who are tasked to enforce it. Yea, the Elf sitteth on his ass and doeth nothing, despite the writing inside the report. The Soothsayers cackled on the Summary, and not the meat of the report itself, and there was great dooming in the land, such dooming that there never was doom as this doom doometh.
3. But Trump triumphed at the G7 Summit. He commandeth the attention of all, and all sought to woo him over. Yet Trump resisteth their harlot, whose brow crawleth off his face in embarrassment.
4. Yet Trump meeteth the Fatty, and the democrat encourageth war instead. The Nevers crieth out that it meaneth nothing at all, yet the Fatty doeth things not heard of in his land.
5. The Fatty and the Trump walketh in the garden, and smile and talk to each other. No war pride parades in the Kingdom, and the returneth of the bones of our soldiers commenceth. Much is to be done, but the Nevers whineth on. The Kristol and Will pisseth in the wind, and cavorteth with donkeys to sooth their wounded pride.
6.But yea, there was much more good to come to the people of Trump. For GDP riseth up to levels not possible according to the wisdom of the cacklers, but Trumps ways are not their ways, nor Trumps thoughts their thoughts.
7. For Trump doeth, not talketh. He waveth the wand and jobs come forth. He waveth the wand and unemployment collapses. He waveth the wand and blacks getteth jobs. He waveth the wand, and the people rejoiceth.
8. And the crumbs spilleth over, and the blacks rise up. Several throweth off the shackles, and are given the light. They beholdeth the truth which their Dems hid from them. They walketh away in trickles, yet the stream groweth.
9. And the rallies of old appeareth, and great is the joy of the attendees. For this is vintage Trump, Trump the unpredictable, Trump the Labeler, and Trump the Mocker. And the people laugheth at his jokes, and contemplate the seriousness of his words, knowing there is yet work to be done.
10.He appeareth in Pennsylvania. He appeareth in Carolina. He appeareth in Fargo, of all places. He appeareth in the media. Savoir-Faire is everywhere., and cannot be contained.
11. the media attacketh Trump with illegal children in cages, yet the Tweet striketh back. The media loseth its power, and the cages of Obama come forth. The media lieth again, and are caught. They go to the polls, yet the polls claimeth that people want deportations. The media lasheth out again, and the liberals whineth louder. Trump giveth them children to reunite, yet the deportation remaineth. And some people doomed again, and others held a toast of kool-aid that all was well.
12.And the media reeleth again when they seeth the child trafficking, and tried to hide it. But they are bypassed by the people and their influence wanes heavily.
13. Then the liberals starteth the war on republican women, as Sanders leaveth a bitchy Red Hen. Yet a McConnell standeth up to the mob.
14.And then, a thunderbolt struck the land. Verily verily, I say unto you, that there was a wailing not heard since Trump won, for SCOTUS supporteth the Travel Ban which causeth more lava to pour from Hawaii. It rendereth the 9th illegitimate, and crusheth the souls of the liberal and cuck. There was much lamentations among them all, but the Work of Trump was not finished.
15. And then another Rod from God striketh. The SCOTUS issueth a decree: No longer would one be compelled to pay tribute to a Union. And hell broke out among the masses while the people of Trump gloateth at their misery. Goresuch came through, as did a Kennedy . And there was much more moaning heard throughout the land, and it was glorious to behold.
16. But wait! There’s moar! A Kennedy announces his retirement, and heads explodeth everywhere. “Biden Rule” they cry! ”The Senate must wait until the next election” the vaginas screameth! “Its not fair!!!” yelleth the Left. Ambrosia to the Gloaters ears, to hear the anguish of mine enemies and their tears tasteth like manna from heaven.
17. Tis a good time to gloat, and I gloateth on. Whether thy doom is full or thou imbibeth the aid, tis been a good week.